click here to read the posts from *stonecutters made while i drove across the usa

My Trip 7/9/01 Sunburned. 750+ miles, Bedminster to Terre Haute, Indiana. Pennsylvania is way too fucking big and a real chore to drive across. Further west things started becoming interesting while going through the Appalachians and the various tunnels but I felt nothing but relief upon leaving Pennsylvania. I think PA helped prepare me for the horror of Kansas later on. Fucked up and deleted all pictures taken before and during the drive from New Jersey. Upset because one pic was me with my sister and Ben and Kate. I'm going to take new ones. I have farmer's sunburn. Motherfuck does it hurt and my left arm's muscles hurt as well so it has me unnecessarily worried because it's probably just sunburn and nothing more. West Virginia was really weeny teeny tiny along with being the first state where it was legal to drive seventy five miles an hour. Once I saw the speed limit, I did a double take and floored it. It was so damned amazing to be able to speed like that after being trapped in New Jersey where they maintain 55 mph most everywhere and it's 65 mph on the NJ Turnpike but if you go a single mile over the limit you'll get fined double what you would normally be fined along with other fines some dickhead state trooper might slap on you. During the night I dreamt that I ran across Diane and she told me how she had always been hot for me and she was waiting for me to approach her. It was strange. I don't know how I dealt with the issue of her having a boyfriend and an Asian fetish but she did climb on me and we dry humped fully clothed. Cool. Brian was cranky. He doesn't seem to like navigating the truck and he refuses to let me hop in and take care of tight situations that I could easily navigate. He's used to tiny cars, I'm used to land yachts. Only problem I had with the truck is that I was backing the truck up into the driveway and banged it into a tree which told me that I oughta just pull in nose-first and load from the rear. So much for convenience. By the time we were in Ohio, things were getting dark. Ohio was the only state of the union where I felt like I was in redneck territory because of the people I saw at the one rest stop where Brian and I stopped off for a lukewarm meal at Burger King and to make phone calls. Every time I rolled down the window I smelled something burning in the distance. I have no idea what's going on in Ohio but I'm glad I'm nowhere near it. One neat thing that I noticed when we got near the Ohio / Indiana border was that the sun seemed to start rising in the west for a wee bit. I was fairly happy then when we stopped for a small dinner in Ohio I got depressed and asked myself "What am I doing?" On the drive away I could hear the roar of my tires on the asphalt being a chorus of demons singing about the bad which lies ahead. 308 fill 1.49/gallon for plus 689 fill 1.39/gallon for plus Upon entering Indiana we learned we were in Tony Raper territory. That was fucking hilarious. Indiana was foggy since 70 went over lots of rivers and creeks (probably creeks pronounced cricks as well). That's where I noticed that I was driving much slower and being cautious for some reason. I drove slow because I'm going night blind or I drove slow because I was in unfamiliar territory. Maybe it was the fact that the roads weren't lit and I'm used to there being lights every five feet on roads in New Jersey. Right now I really want to have something familiar. Also I need to make a note to contact the Birds to make sure they have a key for the apartment so I can unload my stuff and shove it into the apartment. Now we're going to check out of this motel and head to hhsb's place. 7/10/01 Illinois was flat, the first real flat state that I remember seeing while driving out to Colorado. I heard stories about state troopers swarming all over and being assured of receiving a speeding ticket but I only saw two state troopers and they were in the opposite lane dealing with poor saps they caught for whatever reason. Whee, spent the night with Brian over at hhsb's place. It was a bit tense because hhsb likes to have her place "just so" and I felt like I was intruding but that's me being insecure and paranoid. Big surprise, eh? Brian seemed cool with everything though. 932 fill 1.29/gallon for plus She was kind enough to get both of us dinner over at some Welsh pub in St. Louis followed by visiting the arch and looking at the Mississippi river which wasn't as wide as I thought it would be. hhsb drove us past this place called the Moolah Temple which is a former Shriner's temple that's been abandoned ever since she could remember. The Moolah Temple picture is at the top of the page. Back at her place we talked and stuff, Brian promised to make her a few dubs of anime for her along with a copy of the radio version of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy especially after he closed the top door into her apartment effectively locking her out until we pried the doorknob off for her. As lovely parting gifts for visiting hhsb, I received three four-packs of soda, root beer, orange soda and cream soda along with two jars of tomato sauce and a bottle of barbeque sauce. Lovely! Missouri was big and could've felt as interminable as Pennsylvania but the scenery was varied enough and I was driving fast enough that I didn't care. On the second leg through Missouri I think it didn't bother me because I was more focused on getting to Tulsa while in Pennsylvania we had no idea where we would eventually stop. If I didn't get so tired and cranky towards the end I'm sure we could've driven all the way to St. Louis.

7/11/01 hhsb was nice enough to make us breakfast the next day. Ends up that she got a phone call from work saying she had to go in early rather than later on during the day like she had planned so it was a big rush to get all the stuff out of her place and into the car. Brian messed up and ended up locking the inside door to her apartment which wasn't supposed to get locked because hhsb didn't have the key to it. I got out the toolbox from my car and Brian tried to get the doorknob off then hhsb finished the job. She was in a hurry. I was in a hurry. It was time to move on. We drove on down to Tulsa. We got split up and Brian thought I had rocketed ahead of him considering the speed limit was 75 in MO and OK and I had thought Brian was still putt putt putting along behind me so I had stopped at two rest stops waiting for him to catch up either physically or to get within broadcast distance for the walkie talkies. Thinking he was way behind I called the cell phone and found out he was ahead of me. Shit. I floored it doing ninety or a hundred along 44 until I caught up with him at a rest area where I discovered a place to spend the night in Tulsa. I checked in and he went off to his grandparents. HHG2G is not good for walkie talkies because sound effects sound like call button on walkie talkies. I forget the mileage. Stupid me, I packed my notebooks and didn't think of bringing one along with me to keep a record of the mileage and gas prices. The mileage and gas prices above were to the best of my recollection. I think I really entered Oklahoma when I drove through what was the world's largest Mc Donald's that spanned the highway. My impressions of the state were that people really like having picnics along highways and really don't have any need to fill their gas tanks. It was cool seeing the signs along the road that said "Don't pick up hitchhikers because they're probably escaped prisoners." What? A rootin' tootin' state like Oklahoma can't keep their convicts behind bars? Brian kept going off on how strict the cops are in Oklahoma but I didn't get hassled by any cops and I only saw one on patrol while we approached Tulsa, the Center of the Universe. Once we got to the motel room I called Devo, Brian called his grandparents and then I called home. After Brian had showered his grandparents came along to pick him up so he could stay over there for free. We were going to get dinner but considering how late it was getting and the fact that Brian's grandparents go to bed quite early (9:30) we figured it was best that his grandparents pick him up and that would be that. Unfortunately we thought we would go get dinner and Devo told us of a good barbeque place that we didn't go to and Devo went to meet up with us there but we weren't there. Thank goodness she had her cell on her to let her know what happened. When she came over to the motel I showed her my baby book and we went out for a long drive around Tulsa where she showed me where she used to party, a hill that she would drive down and could catch air if she was going fast enough along with stopping over at this bridge over the Arkansas river where we talked a bit while watching the folks fishing and I pointed out the stars to her. I showed her Scorpio, her birth sign, and pointed out Mars which was close to Scorpio. Bad thing is that I didn't bring along my camera to take pictures of stuff but there's always next time. Pictures of the oil man who had his balls sanded off because they were "lewd", this squat muscled guy statue with monster truck tires for legs and big praying hands. Devo had to go home because she had work tomorrow. 7/12/01 Spent the entire day in the motel room because it seems the ignition key finally gave up the ghost and I needed a new ignition setup. The ignition key was already quite thin, bent like Uri Geller bent it, and this was all due to the fact that the steering lock locked in just the wrong way that I couldn't jostle or torque the wheel until I could start the car. Even if I had it hotwired it still wouldn't have disengaged the steering lock. Thankfully I had the truck and I went down to the Texaco where they towed and fixed the car for $126.10. At least I knew I could start the car and leave Tulsa the next day. Devo came home and took a looong nap because she had a busy day at work but eventually she came around to the motel and we went off to get dinner at Wendy's, get Brian and see Final Fantasy on the Imax screen. Before that we picked up Shawn and I got to meet the pigs who nibbled on my fingernail but after those few seconds it was time to leave for the movie. The movie was alright, the animators did a good job but couldn't animate negro lips realistically. At least the story and the effects were on the same level rather than the effects taking center stage and the story simply being something thrown in to keep people's interest in the quiet spots. Oh yeah, the bad guy should've been played by Jack Nicholson rather than James Woods. James Woods' character looked like a young Jack Nicholson and I'm sure the voice acting would've been better. After the movie we dropped off Shawn and went over to Devo's house to meet the doggies and I got to meet Rocky who was very friendly and he looked like a little rascal with his bandana and then I got to meet Rowdy who always wants to play ball and even in the dark he found a ball to bring someone so they'd throw the ball and he could catch it. Charlie couldn't come out because he was busy being Devo's dad's pillow. Our time grew short, we dropped Brian off at his grandparents' place and we went back to my room so I could show her my astronomy program Starry Night Backyard. I whined about how we didn't have enough time and I felt down but I sucked it up and kissed her good night. A postscript to getting my car fixed, apparently the mechanic was spiteful or incompetent when he replaced the key assembly in my steering column because I discovered long after I left Oklahoma that I had no horn or dome light in the car. The mechanics who fixed my starter and driver's side window recently said that it would cost $180 bucks at most to track down where the short in the system is that makes the horn beep relentlessly when they changed the fuse. I assume the same goes for the dome light. I also feel like a great big dork for being such a whiner and I feel awkward because I didn't remember Devo expressing the same kind of sentiment either. She just chided me for coming in the middle of the week when she has no time rather than coming on a weekend when she would've had time.

Friday the 13th I called Devo before I left to say goodbye and by eleven Brian had been dropped off and we got back on the road. Colorado was twelve hours away. The worst of it all was driving through Kansas. Flat, featureless, empty and forlorn. The monotony of the drive got to me even though I was listening to The Sorceror's Stone on tape and I screamed for about fifteen minutes while driving down that empty stretch of I-70 towards Colorado. Whenever I see a license plate from Kansas I have an overwhelming urge to find that car's driver and express my sympathy to them for the fact that they live in Kansas. I hear Nebraska is worse with the monotony and emptiness but such concepts are incomprehensible to me. The neat thing that I saw in Kansas were these huge clouds of smoke on the horizon that Brian explained were farmers burning their excess crops in order to keep the prices up so they can continue to make a living as farmers. I tried to imagine how big those fires were but I couldn't ascribe any sort of measurement to them other than just being simply big. From that, I got a sense of scale of how big everything is in America and how small everything is in my former corner of this great nation. Driving into Colorado was ominous because the darkness descended upon us so quickly along with the lightning flashing in the distance, lighting up the clouds and striking the ground. Never mind the fact that it was Friday the 13th. When it started raining I started driving even slower and it became scary for me to keep Brian within my sights since I was unfamiliar with the road, couldn't see worth dick and the rain. Colorado Springs was so close but the drive seemed to take forever. Y'know? Once we got onto 24 it was dark and my night vision was sucking like it had earlier on plus I was driving slower since we were on dark, rainy roads. My patience had run out, Brian was speeding ahead in the truck and I almost lost him a few times plus I was tired of driving. We stopped off at a Safeway on the outskirts of Colorado Springs, Brian went inside to get me seltzer and to stretch his legs. I peed behind the truck to celebrate my arrival then I waddled over to the pay phones to try and call Devo and tell her that I got into Colorado safely but I think I remembered her phone number was wrong. Bah. I fired up the laptop and got the directions down to the apartment before the battery died and we finally arrived around eleven at night. Brian parked in the street but kept the hazards running even though he was parked close to the curb and I was cranky and tired. Jaybird and maribou came out to greet us and I don't remember too much except we went down to my apartment then up to their apartment and walked to the 7-11 for some stuff and then watched a wee bit of TV upstairs before settling down for the night. Oh! I had mail waiting for me when I got here. A padded envelope from Devo and three postcards from Makonan. Also bullshit junkmail which was quickly trashed. 7/14/01 We unloaded the truck early in the morning and everything fit through the doors of the apartment much to my relief since I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get anything down into the basement. We went over to maribou's work and looked around at the selection of used books then Jaybird treated us to lunch at the hippie cafe next door to maribou's work. Later on, maribou came home and stopped in to say hello and we went out for dinner at this Italian place up the road on Tejon. I can't remember much because I'm so tired and I still feel overwhelmed and tired from everything. 7/15/01 This was a big day. We drove around to see The Garden of the Gods, saw the right-wing family center, went to Manitou Springs and visited the only "new age" store in the area. We drove over to Target where I got a lawn chair and house stuff that I didn't get the first time on Saturday when Brian and I went to Wal Mart the other day. Later we went to this arcade where all the games were a nickel or a combination of nickels to play and had Italian again at this place that Jaybird really likes called Bambino's and it was keen because they gave us the remote control for the TV so we could watch something other than the crap on MTV. Back at the Birds we watched The Whole Nine Yards then Fight Club. Whee! 7/16/01 Brian went home today. I successfully drove him to the airport without getting lost, the fiasco with his ticket back home was ironed out and we hung around the airport lobby talking and waiting for the clock to run out. Called my father for a few minutes and then Brian went back to New Jersey. I miss Brian even though I'm happy to be out here on my own where I can do my own thing and not get told "I'd like to come back here" or hear some exasperated sigh when I make a coarse comment about people under my breath. Since I'm not a chick I didn't think of bringing the digital camera along with me when I dropped him off at the airport so I could have one last picture of my best friend. It's little stuff like that which makes women so groovy. Tired. Back at the apartment I started getting stuff together, unpacking stuff here and there and napped a lot. Oh yeah, Pinky's doing fine except I feel bad for him because the travel tank isn't as big as the tank he's used to (it's back in New Jersey. Sunday night I was brain fried and there was stuff where I just didn't care that I left it back in Jersey and I just wanted the move to be over with already) but he seems to be getting along just fine. The Birds went out to watch wrestling and I went to bed really early. 7/17/01 maribou and I went to the mall to get keys made and get even more stuff that I need to get settled in my apartment like sponges, tape, shower curtain rings and dishwashing fluid. Everything else that follows has been chronicled in my diary. Go check it out now!