2/19/08
One thing that always sends a shiver down my spine is when someone declares that I am their best friend. Every time this happens it always becomes a harbinger that person ends up no longer getting me, no longer acts like a friend or simply fades away into the sunset. Heck I don't even have to engage in self-destructive acts, become needlessly needy and emotionally unstable.

Every time I'm declared to be someone's best friend suddenly I'm not their best friend. Okay maybe it's not so sudden and it takes a few months. No one has ever approached me over it but I rarely, if ever, declare someone to be my best friend for fear of this happening to someone else.

I still don't know what I'm going to cook for dinner this week. I have The Joy of Cooking which declares that it contains 4,500 recipes. From glancing through the tome I've discovered not all of them require dairy or the fermented feces known as cheese. Maybe Monday I'll open it to a few random pages, pick something and be done with it.

One thing I forgot to mention from the caucus. I was among the first people to arrive at the caucus which involved me sitting around in an art room. People were filtering in, some were joking "You with the light side or dark side" since the Democrats were on the opposite end of the building.

One of the yentas, yes there are yentas in Colorado Springs and they're not necessarily Jewish, came in and was cursing under her breath about how the Democrats were helping the elderly find their way around the building and to find a seat. Now I'm not the best Republican in the world but I do remember the elderly being taken advantage of by the Republicans in the 2000 election which preciptated the whole George W. Bush shitstorm which has crushed the Republic under his heel.

So was this yenta annoyed that the Democrats got wise and were using our tactics? Was this bitch a hardcore objectivist who sincerely believes it is best for society if the elderly take matters into their own hands and fight with younger people in order to find a comfortable seat to rest their centuried legs?

Anyway I finally remembered it and got around to posting it here for your amusement.

And if you're not amused go fuck yourself, faggot.

As you may or may not know, gentle reader, I happen to have a great big glass jar full of soda can pull tabs. Now and again I wonder if I should sell them but then I realize that they're mine, it took me five years to get this many tabs and I rather play with them like Scrooge McDuck plays with his money.

Anyway I posted an ad on Craigslist in hopes of getting some serious offers. Every single god damned response has been "DURRRRR DIALYSIS AND RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE". Every single god damned reply I send back to these people is telling them that it's just an urban legend, nobody accepts soda can pull tabs as money (unless you're in Fallout) even if it is for a charitable cause.

There is no hope for humanity.