As part of Jaybird's selfless attempt to improve me, he explained that he made the acquiantance of a martial arts master over at Colorado College. I tried to explain to him that I had no time. See I was on a quest to find these toilet tank fresheners that were yellow and gave the water a lemony fresh scent. They weren't in the drawers, the closet nor anyplace else where I remember leaving them. Plus the supermarket didn't have a fucking aisle for bathroom paraphenalia.

Surprisingly maribou was going to attend these sessions. Long story short, we wandered through the maze of buildings and tunnels which make up the campus until we arrived on the third floor of a nameless building. All the while Jaybird was giving running commentary about the master's qualifications and achievements. I made a wrong turn into a math class which was full of dead people. The Birds called for me to stop fucking around and come into the right hallway.

This door had a sign in a strange language that I've never encountered in waking or dream life but I could kindasorta comprehend the message. "Teachers Only" We advanced despite the admonition. Outside on the roof we were beset by two black kids who were shouting "You aren't allowed up here" and they were soon joined by an angry red headed woman who seemed to be arguing to give their claim an air of legitimacy.

My only rejoinder was, "Bring us some faculty. Why should we believe students like you? How do we know that you're students?" The redhead took a swing at me but I grabbed her wrists and started squeezing them really hard. Like a broken record I repeated my demand. That's when I remembered her. She was the chick who I gave a swirly to earlier in the dream which began my original quest to find the toilet tank fresheners.

A youngish Asian man leapt over the wall and tapped the redhead on the forehead. Now she was imbued with the knowledge of mystical Asian fighting styles which she used to kick my ass. For the remainder of the dream I watched from a third person perspective as she kicked my body's ass.

Everything went black and I awoke in a storage room. Jaybird and maribou were laying on cots, icebags on their head. The sensei had a fierce black eye and was sympathetically looking at me. Basically had he known that we were his students this would've never have happened to us. He rummaged around in his black pants and pulled out a beat up little pouch which was full of lint. This was something called boojum, ancient Chinese secret, the weed of emperors. Just like a senzu bean from Dragonball Z, I would be completely returned to full health if I smoked a bowl with him.