4/20/06
Wake up you stupid potheads, it's Hitler's birthday! I think it's also Earth Day too. raddidge also informed me that the anniversary of Oklahoma City was a day or two ago. I one-upped her and reminded her that the government assaulted and murdered the folks at the Branch Davidian Waco compound.

Most likely you were unaware of my whereabouts on Wednesday evening. I left work and immediately made my way towards The Compound to pick up my lady fair and take her out to dinner. Plus we were going to stop by Costco and marvel at its gross excesses. We ate at a Chinese buffet where I told her about the works of Heinlein along with those who emulate his style, how Heinlein was a dirty old man who never saw a day of combat and yet the old bastard might've called Haldeman a whiney pussy for surviving the horrors of Viet Nam. Of course it's easy to speak ill of the dead since they can't get any iller.

Is that a word? Iller?

By the time we got finished, Costco had already shut its doors for the night. com Costco. raddidge survived the horrors of the Howard Stern show. Such a trooper. Our evening was rounded out looking at the stars over at The Compound and my needful visit to use the facilities.

One thing that surprised me was the fact that her younger brother was cheerful and sounded happy to see me. Reckon they're starting to like me over there. Her other brother was busy at work.

Now Spot's climbing all over me, purring, sniffing and staring at me because she hasn't seen me for fourteen hours. Let's all sing along to the great Red Peters and his ballad "Come, Stains".

Wednesday night was one of new things for fat old me. While we were driving to dinner I saw a real, live coyote! I never expected that I would ever see one, especially someplace that's more suburban than rural. First off, this noble beast was far from what this suburb boy from New Jersey had imagined in his mind's eye. Unlike a dog, he loped with confidence. Head and tail held high with maturity. Plus the coyote was much bigger! I always figured coyotes would've been a little less than knee height (metric, not imperial knee units since metric is smaller and the global standard) and scurrilous varmints. This critter was about as big as Katie (PBUH), distinctly leaner but more wiry than skeletal. Man, I should've stopped home for a minute to pick up the camera but raddidge told me that my memory would last much longer.

Over at the buffet, I had a mussel for the first time evar. I've eaten molluscs in the past but never a gastropod. First, it was chewy and I think there was seawater in its body. Hey, I tried it and I never have to do it again. Of course maybe fresher mussels are better. Maybe there's a nationwide rule that's akin to a New Jersey rule of never, never, never order seafood at a diner. The national rule being never, never, never get seafood at a Chinese buffet or any kind of buffet.

Finally on my ride home there was this asshole who was speeding along the left lane and started coming right up my ass. I figured that I'd bust their balls and stay in the lane or wait for them to pass on the right so I could flip the bird. Something better happened, much better. Out of nowhere a cop car turned onto the stretch of road and pulled over the person. I've never been party to such an event in my life.

So, I'm happy. Tomorrow I'll post about how raddidge wants to know how I'd handle an encounter with myself.