7/20/05
Here are notes on what I was going to write about for tonight's entry.
Here are notes on what I was going to write about for tonight's entry.
All that matters is the work
Do something that I enjoy
Fame and fortune are unnecessary compared to the rewards of following my dreams
What I do all day is keep myself busy for a paycheck. At best it's a game. At worst, it's making old age catch up with me after eluding its cold grasp for so long.
I don't think I'll get around to writing about those topics. Right now I'm not feeling particularly creative, I feel nagged and just want some peace and quiet.
Finally, if I didn't make it clear. I fucking hate being on the telephone.
in yer dreams
I was living in the basement of a treehouse. My sister lived upstairs. One of the things which stood out from the dream was taking the spiral staircase growing out of the trunk to go up and down between the apartments.
My sister was dating Buddha from New Jersey. From the old gaming group. She brought him into my apartment which really got on my nerves. Seconds later I had knocked him to the floor and was pummelling him with my fists. When the mood had passed, I saw that he was still laying on the ground but unbloodied and unbruised from the altercation.
A lot of rage still burned in me. When I woke up, I just felt tired and had a serious case of drag ass.
My sister was dating Buddha from New Jersey. From the old gaming group. She brought him into my apartment which really got on my nerves. Seconds later I had knocked him to the floor and was pummelling him with my fists. When the mood had passed, I saw that he was still laying on the ground but unbloodied and unbruised from the altercation.
A lot of rage still burned in me. When I woke up, I just felt tired and had a serious case of drag ass.
anyway
I told this to my father in an email. I'll post it here.
I don't feel human. I don't feel part of anything.
The situation just makes me want to distance myself from the rest of the world.
Everything seems pointless.
